When Time Stopped

Lessons from MMA that shaped my perspective

February 02, 2025

There’s a moment in every fighter’s life when time freezes.

The noise fades.

The heartbeat slows.

And you’re left with one simple question echoing in your mind: “Who am I?”

For me, that moment came in the middle of an amateur MMA fight.

I had my opponent locked in an armbar.

Victory was within arms reach—literally.

But as I prepared to finish the submission, a voice pierced through the adrenaline-fueled haze.

It was my mother’s voice, clear as day, asking me,

“Is this worth it? Is this who you want to be?”

That was the first time I truly understood the power of choice.

Fighting Isn’t About Violence—It’s About Control

People often think martial arts is about aggression, dominance, or the thrill of victory. But at its core, it’s about control—control over your body, your mind, and your emotional spirit.

In that fight, I had all the power. I could’ve cranked the submission, permanently altering my opponent’s career. But instead, I chose restraint. I held on just long enough to secure the win without causing unnecessary harm.

That choice didn’t make me weak. It made me stronger.

Mercy is for the strong

Because real strength isn’t about how hard you can win.

It’s about how much power you can wield without losing yourself.

The Balance Between Instinct and Intention

We all face moments where our instincts scream louder than our values:

  • The urge to snap back in an argument.

  • The temptation to cut corners when no one’s watching.

  • The desire to win at any cost.

But instincts are just reactions. They don’t define us. Our intentions do.

In martial arts—and in life—you’re constantly walking a fine line between instinct and intention. The goal isn’t to suppress your instincts but to master them. To feel the rush of adrenaline without letting it control you. To acknowledge fear without being ruled by it.

That’s what martial arts taught me: You are not your emotions.

You are the choices you make in response to them.

Compassion Isn’t Weakness. It’s the Ultimate Strength.

When people see fighters step into the ring, they expect ferocity, not compassion. But here’s the truth most people don’t understand:

Compassion is what separates a real martial artist from a street fighter.

It’s easy to fight out of rage. It’s easy to dehumanize your opponent.

But to fight with love—to see the humanity in the person standing across from you—that takes courage.

My compassion doesn’t come from some grand philosophy.

It comes from my family.

From the lessons my parents instilled in me.

From the understanding that every person I face is

someone’s child,

someone’s sibling,

someone’s story.

And in honoring their humanity, I honor my own.

Discipline Equals Freedom

Jocko Willink popularized the phrase “Discipline equals freedom,” and at first, it sounds like a paradox.

How can rules and structure lead to freedom?

  • When you master your habits, you free yourself from chaos.

  • When you control your emotions, you free yourself from impulsive decisions.

  • When you trust your training, you free yourself from doubt.

Martial arts isn’t about learning a million’s of techniques.

You mastering a few so deeply and intentionally that they become part of who you are.

In Jiu-Jitsu, I rely on just a few core moves as do many other high level professionals.

That’s it.

But I’ve drilled them so relentlessly that no matter what chaos unfolds, I know exactly what to do.

Simplicity isn’t a limitation.

Simplicity is liberation.

The Real Fight is Within

The hardest battles aren’t fought in cages or on mats. They’re fought in the quiet moments:

  • The struggle to get up when motivation fades.

  • The fight against self-doubt when no one’s watching.

  • The war between who you are and who you’re becoming.

You don’t have to win every battle to win the war.

Some days you’ll feel lost. Some days you’ll question your purpose.

That’s okay.

What matters is that you keep showing up—with love, with intention, and with the courage to face yourself honestly.

Become A Warrior Scholar

If any of this resonates with you—if you’ve ever felt lost, driven by instinct instead of intention, or hungry for growth—you’re not alone.

I’ve been there. I’m still there, in many ways.

But I’ve learned that the path of the warrior isn’t about perfection. It’s about progress.

If you want to walk this path with me:

Let’s grow together. Not just as fighters, but as humans.

Because the real victory isn’t in defeating others. It’s in mastering yourself.

-GMQ

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